If a pirate were ever to move to a suburban neighborhood, we’re guessing this is the exact sign they would choose to put up on their front yard. Well, that sign and maybe a model of a ship. Come election season, you’re expected to put up lawn signs publically announcing your political opinions.
Well, “expected” is a big word. It’s just the only time when obnoxious people are given a license to be obnoxious without anyone deeming them trolls. (Not to their faces, anyway.) But why would one even choose a political side when alcohol never loses? Well, almost never.
A Piece of History
Landmark signs are a big tourist attraction — for some reason, people love reading that something happened precisely where they were standing 500 years ago. Think about it — why else would so many people visit Plymouth Rock?
Perhaps it's their way of feeling like a part of history? At least this lawn knows that it has nothing to offer and declares as much. No one can claim that the place is overhyped when the actual landowner literally advertises it as the place where nothing happened. Imagine driving hundreds of miles just to see this sign! Totally worth it in our opinion!
Mission Statement
Look, we are all for free speech. It's just that it's a human right we wish fewer people exercised. Just because you have a political opinion, doesn't mean you have to discuss it with your friends or neighbors or your kids' PTA. When you're sick and tired of your neighbors asking you who you're voting for — this is the sign to put up.
The fact of the matter is, you're simply not convinced any of the candidates running are worthy, and you cannot be bothered to explain why for the 50th time this week, so you found a sign that does it for you!
Sweet Dreams
This is a pretty charming way to ask people to stay off the grass politely. Charming yet a little passive-aggressive, no doubt. What kind of monster would ever think to step on tiny grass and wake it while it sleeps? Not us, that's for sure!
We are a little puzzled about something here — the sign seems to be hanging on a bamboo pole in a bamboo pile. Was the sign actually ironic about the bamboo being the "tiny grass"? Or, if there is, indeed, tiny grass off the frame that is currently busy sleeping, woulnd't a sign be more effective if it was placed in the actual grass?
Devoted Wife
Never underestimate the power of an upset woman — or a well-crafted sign. When this woman found out her husband was being less than faithful, she decided that sharing the knowledge was a must. Not only did this wife find out the names of the women her two-timing spouse had a thing with, but she also decided that a public announcement was in order.
And she was totally right. One sheet and two cans of spray paint later, she had a professionally printed sign and the whole neighborhood knew why Chester was about to get his clothes set on fire. You go, girl!
No Soliciting...Unless It's Thin Mints
We're not going to lie, we completely understand the need for an elaborate sign like this. Imagine being at home, minding your own business, making tea, or playing FIFA or something, and the doorbell rings. Is it the burrito you ordered twenty minutes ago? Nope. It's a guy who wants you to buy a thing.
Now imagine it happening multiple times a day. Ugh. This sign has got it covered — unless you're selling Thin Mints, you're welcome to leave. We wonder how many solicitors visited this house before these homeowners before they decided enough was enough and purchased this custom-made sign.
A Warning Sign
On the one hand, there's you wanting to protect your house. On the other hand, you have the outrageous prices of good security systems. Security systems are incredibly expensive and it's not like you can just DIY one of those. (If you live in Florida, however, there is a chance you could get away with digging up a moat around your house and filling it with crocodiles.)
Anyway, when your budget is low, but the stakes are high, sometimes you have to get creative. This sign is definitely a budget-friendly method of keeping thieves away, and may honestly be a more practical approach to things.
The Meme Team
Over the years, memes have taken over the internet and slowly seeped into the outside world and the way we talk to each other. Apparently, they have taken over the yard sale market as well. They seem even to have the power to get passersby to come to your garage sale.
You know that if the person that wrote this sign has a sense of humor, they probably also have a sense of style — which is reason enough to go scavage at their garage sale. We have a feeling that there is going to be some cool vintage stuff in there.
Doomsday 2016
Come election time, most people become very vocal about who they are planning on voting for. Walking around your neighborhood, you'll probably see lawn signs endorsing your neighbor's preferred candidate. And you'll probably be sick of it.
This homeowner sure as heck is sick of it. And we completely get it. Leave politics off your lawns, people! Not only did no one ask, but now you also have this eyesore in your front yard. This lawn sign makes it clear that this guy was not very enthusiastic about 2016's candidates. We'll hand it to them, at least they were honest!
Hey Girl, Hey!
It doesn't get better than shopping with Ryan Gosling. There's something about this man and yard sales that gets people going. There is nothing like the combination of a good-looking dude and the opportunity of getting a good deal on a vintage lampshade to get people swarming to your doorstep.
Maybe it's the fact that Ryan Gosling looks like the perfect partner to go bargain hunting with — you know, the kind of guy that knows how to haggle. He could probably get you that lampshade for way less than the asking price. And even if he couldn't, we'd forgive him... look at that face!
Zombie for President
When all the other candidates suck — which is oftentimes the case — there's no choice but to turn to some nice, brain-eating zombies. If you've ever seen a post-apocalyptic movie, you know that the zombies are going to take over anyway, so why not just please them by surrendering now?
Besides, they might not be such bad rulers after all. Sure, they aren't very bright, but hey, if they can't understand how cars or money work, that means they can't raise gas prices! Sadly, though, they probably can't read either, which means they are unaware of this person's support.
Good Intentions
Ladies and gentlemen, we would like to turn your attention to the cute washi tape at the top of this note. Just making sure everybody sees the sweet graphics on it before we proceed. Everyone got a good look? Great. Now, on to the man who put it there, who is just as adorable. This man is our new hero.
A nice gesture for his wife turned out to be a creepy letter left for the whole neighborhood to read. We bet the person who read the letter was more than happy to receive it. It's always nice to feel loved, even if it is by mistake. How do you think he understood a mistake had been made?
Check, Mate
There is no drama like lawn drama. We need to know what the premise of this neighborhood feud is! Why did someone call the police on this lawn, it looks absolutely magnificent to us! Are these birds protecting this yard?
We're not sure exactly what happened, but words like "your move" are words that frighten us. We'd keep our distance. That being said, we would also like to set up a camera there just to see what the neighbor's next move actually is. Our money is on filling their own lawn with a bunch of decorative dinosaurs. You know, just to one-up Flamingo Dude.
Rest in Peace, Old Man
Well, if this isn't the very definition of in-your-face, then we don't know what is. We wonder what kind of grandpa that man was to have earned the "finally" on that hot pink sign. We hope that apart from dentures and canes, this old man left behind some worthwhile stuff.
Maybe that's the reason his family wanted him to move on to the next plane of existence so much. We have never been to an estate sale but are very interested in visiting one. So if you've gone looking for gold at an old man's house, give us some tips!
A Boxer on a Cardboard Box
This is about as creative as it gets. It's simple, yet so on point. Can you imagine Mike Tyson at a garage sale? Going through cardboard boxes and trying to get a good deal on a vanity mirror or a cake mixer? Well, now you can. You're welcome.
This sign is an "if you know, you know" kind of situation, and for those who may not know, Mike Tyson has a slight lisp. And though we are against poking fun at people for any sort of speech impediment, we couldn't help but giggle! Very slightly and inaudibly (we don't want to get in trouble with that guy), but still giggle.
Everything Must Go!
"Cheating Garage Wife Sale"? That can't be right. Oh, wait, now we get it. It's the placement of the writing on the two sides of the cardboard that had us confused for a minute there. Plus, there is the fact that the bottom half of the sign goes top to bottom and then left to right. Not much consistency there, but we get it. The guy is going through a difficult time.
When this man wrote, "everything must go," he meant everything! Including his unloyal wife. This will probably be the most savage yet worthwhile yard sale you'll attend this year. We wonder if his wife and her lover came to the sale to buy back all of his belongings before moving out!
That Christmas Spirit
This sign you need to hear in order to understand. You might also need to know some Spanish, or at least what "Navidad" means. (It means Christmas.) Most people get in the Christmas mood by adding decorations such as lights and snowmen, but when you're tight on money, it's always nice to think outside the box and DIY something.
What better way to get into the Christmas spirit than by turning a "For Lease" sign into a holiday card for everyone to read as they drive by? At least that's what we hope happened — not kids with a huge Sharpie and too much spare time.
To Steal From a Thief
What do you do when your boyfriend leaves you and takes the dog with him? You get rid of all of his stuff, that's precisely what you do! And what do you do with the money you get from selling all of his stuff? The options are endless and they heavily depend on how much was made.
From treating yourself to a whole pineapple pizza (which he hates) to going on a vacation and getting your groove back, there are no bad ideas here. What kind of person steals someone else's dog? A monster, that's who! Sell his stuff, girl, sell it all!
A Queen on Kingston Avenue
There are many ways to draw someone to an event you're hosting, but this one seems a little puzzling. We don't understand why someone thought that advertising that their grandmother was psycho was a sure way to get people to come to their garage sale.
Maybe they know something about yard sales signs that we don't? Perhaps the fact that she's unhinged means that the prices of the stuff she's selling are very, very low? Another option is that she is selling stuff that no one in their right mind would sell. Either way, it sounds like a sale worth visiting and a grandma worth knowing.
Orange Is the New Black
What does a person on their way to the slammer do with all of their belongings while they're away? Sells them! If there was ever a yard sale to go to, a Going to Jail Sale is it. You know that they are selling everything they own. From clothing to jewelry to furniture — everything must go.
They aren't getting rid of these things because they want to. Instead, they have to. It's a win/win situation. You're buying bargains while doing this guy a favor! Plus, you can get yourself a can of Coke for just 50 cents! That is a major selling point if you ask us.
Pop-Culture
So how exactly do you set your garage sale apart from all the others? Get a high-profile personality to advertise it, of course! Except budget is a thing so you have to get a little creative with an original sign to lure people in. These funny signs reference back to current moments in entertainment that everyone is bound to be familiar with.
Whether it's Macklemore, Batman, or Gandalf (Kanye may not be the best choice for a spokesperson nowadays), someone is bound to know one of these references and have a good laugh. Even if you've only got $20 in your pocket...
Walk This Way
People see yard sales signs all the time. Most of the time they get ignored because we have places to go and people to see and those yard sale excursions are usually not planned. So, the smart thing to do to get both attention and traffic is to find a way to make your sale stand out.
Using memes is a great way to make an impression - to connect with your potential customers. It's like you're creating a sense of kinship with them based on that internet thing you both know. We're guessing everyone that came to this yard sale, came prepared to say, "take my money!"
Batman Will Be There
If it is Batman-approved it must be something special. The Gotham Bat usually knows what he's talking about. It's surprising to see how many Batman references can be found in this article. It is as if Bruce Wayne had a secret love for thrifting they didn't tell us about in the comic books.
Do you think a batmobile was being sold at this yard sale? We sure hope so. The person that wrote this sign was pretty talented. We will give them that! We would U-turn and drive straight to this sale just to see what Batman has to offer...
Tell Me Why!
By now, everyone's familiar with the confused man meme. This yard sale brought him to life once again, confused as to why people aren't buying everything the yard sale has to offer. Well, we don't have an answer for you, man! We are guessing it's probably because the merchandise is not up to par.
It could also be that the sign has no time or address. You know, people need that sort of thing to know when and where your garage sale is. It's not like they would start walking around the neighborhood and ask where is Meme Guy's house.
Super Sale
Going for a walk around the neighborhood and stumbling upon a yard sale sign is usually nothing to write home about. Going for a walk around the neighborhood and stumbling upon a funny yard sale sign, however? Now that's a different story. At the very least, it's something to at least tell social media about.
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! It's a worthwhile yard sale. It takes a lot of confidence to indicate that the things you're selling are so high-quality one might think they've made their way to a department store. Here's to celebrating second-hand treasures!
All Sales Final
Most people put up signs advertising yard sales and cars for sale. (That is if they haven't made the move to Facebook marketplace or a different online platform yet.) Never have we seen husbands for purchase. We wonder what event triggered this.
We're not sure we would want to buy someone else's husband. If she's giving him away he probably did something awful. Then again, we wonder if he is for sale under capacities other than a husband. We wouldn't mind buying the guy if he has any skills as a cleaner or if he knows how to make some solid fried chicken.
Burning Down the House
They say that where there is smoke there is fire. This adage would imply that anyone that has smoke coming out of their mouth is enough cause to call the fire department. Or at least have them sprinkled with water. Smoking is so passé anyway. A clean-cut lawn is where it's all at.
And yet, some people inconsiderately smoke on other people's property. It's a tale as old as time, so this family decided to take matters into their own hands. You've been warned — come near this house with a cigarette, and you'll be sorry. Not to mention, soggy.
We Like Big Sales, and We Cannot Lie
The people having this big yard sale took the classic lyrics to "Baby Got Back," rewrote them, and then used them to promote their sale. Truthfully, this is all we needed to convince us to make our way over to the sale, and we weren't even there. So we're guessing that this sale was a big hit. Almost as big as Sir Mix-A-Lot's 1992 one-hit-wonder.
Now that we're thinking about it, this song has some great yard sale potential. Think about titling the whole event as "Baby Got BackYard Sale" or the lyrics "I like yard sales and I cannot lie." The thing practically writes itself.
Vote for Cat!
There's not much we love more than a good meme, really. So when someone turned this iconic meme into a literal Presidential lawn sign we were beside ourselves. Finally, a Presidential lawn sign that doesn't make us want to opt out of the elections or flee the country.
All other candidates are welcome to lie down and take a nap or something. This Feline politician (politiCAT, if you will) is a clear winner if we have anything to say about it. We'd vote for Keyboard Cat for President, we just want to know who he would choose as vice president. Is it Snoopy?
Taking a Stand
If you are looking to steal a sign, you may want to do a background check on your neighbors before picking them as a target. This Marine takes his lawn signs — as well as his 2nd amendment rights — very seriously.
So, when someone stole his Romney sign, he decided to retaliate in the most fitting way possible — by writing a threat in the form of a lawn sign. After all, he already knows that that's where the thief looks. It's a little like hiding a bomb in a safe you know is about to be broken into.
Ghostbuster
If you've ever moved into an old house or apartment, you've probably wondered about the place's previous tenants. You know, things like what they did for work, or if they had any unfinished business left in this mortal coil, and if their soul is still inhabiting the place, making things go bump in the night.
Real estate agent Jake Palmer got sick of people asking whether the houses he has been showing are haunted, so he added a disclaimer to each and every one of the "for sale" signs. You know, except for the homes that were, in fact, haunted.
Shout It From the Rooftops
Of all the signs featured in this article, we think it's safe to say that this one has been the most touching. The majority of lawn signs are either people declaring their hatred towards solicitors or advertising upcoming yard sales. Not this one, though.
When Ashlea got some good news, she wanted the whole world to know! Spread the love, girl! Honestly, we should all probably do the same. Even with little things. Did you get promoted? Quit smoking? Get a free pizza? Find that pair of sneakers you wanted on sale? Put it on a sign. Consider it a new type of actually positive social network.
It's You, Not Me
Marriage often means that two people choose to stay together despite the things they don't agree on. Politics can usually be one of those things. This family still supports the man of the house in his other endeavors and passions — but they want it to be clear that their political views are not aligned.
This is the ultimate way to clear your name while still showing your love. We are, however, left with the question of where the wife and son's allegiance really is. If only they had their own lawn sign to place next to the Romney one...
Cat's Out of the Bag
People who smoke have every right to harm their own health if they so wish. The problem starts when their disgusting habits are about to harm other people, other people's property, or other people's pets. One way to make sure your cigarettes aren't harming others is to NOT throw the butts on someone else's lawn.
The best way to get someone to stop throwing cigarette butts on the ground is to blame your cat's nicotine dependency. To make matters even more dramatic, they added a photo of the junkie in question! Perhaps they were trying to trigger the culprit's empathy?
We Know Where You Live
There's nothing worse than stepping on dog poop on your own lawn. If you have a dog it may be one occupational hazard, but this is not the case in question here. In this case, you own the lawn. You do NOT own the dog. It is simply unforgivable.
This is not something that can just be glossed over. The only way to handle this is to give the culprit a taste of their own medicine. When they say they're going to send their grandson to retaliate, are they talking about a little kid? Or is their grandson a grown man? We really hope it's the former!
A Sign From Above
Churches have lawns too. And if they have lawns they can have some lawn signs like this one. Except this one has somewhat of an ominous aura to it. You know times are tough when your local church puts up a message delivered by the big guy up there.
We wonder what took place in this community that instigated this sign — but we bet the residents were on their best behavior the second this sign went up. Nobody wants to get a house call. We know what house calls mean when it's your schoolteacher, we wouldn't want to even think about what happens when it's The Almighty.
Thirty, Flirty & Fabulously Old
This has got to be one of the best practical jokes. This young neighborhood wanted everyone to know that someone's turning thirty, and this is the best way to go about it. Apparently, when you hit thirty, you're considered an old man. Evidently, along with the aches and the pains you don't deserve a cake either!
Hey, you'll all get there eventually too. Maybe they rotate these signs around whenever one of them becomes a year older. That could be a fun tradition. We can't wait to see what this person's friends will do when one of them turns forty.
Making Pour Decisions
If a pirate were ever to move to a suburban neighborhood, we're guessing this is the exact sign they would choose to put up on their front yard. Well, that sign and maybe a model of a ship. Come election season, you're expected to put up lawn signs publically announcing your political opinions.
Well, "expected" is a big word. It's just the only time when obnoxious people are given a license to be obnoxious without anyone deeming them trolls. (Not to their faces, anyway.) But why would one even choose a political side when alcohol never loses? Well, almost never.
Take It or Leave It
Here we have a fantastic example of a "take everything my ex owned" kind of yard sale. If there is anything we can learn from that kind of article it is to never leave things at your significant other's house if they aren't all that significant to you. What would one buy from a twenty-something-year-old (we're assuming) anyway?
Student loans and some video games? It doesn't sound too appealing to us, maybe that's why this woman broke up with him in the first place. Let's just hope that her next relationship will be with someone who has more to offer.
Back That Junk Up
Now, normally, we would be hard-pressed to find any variation of "junk in the trunk" that doesn't make us want to hurl or punch the nearest face, but that was before we first saw this gem. This is the best use of the saying "junk in the trunk" we have ever seen.
We are delighted they decided to take the otherwise outdated "compliment" and turn it into a useful and informative garage sale sign. Why yes, we would love to go through your junk, pay for whatever junk might fit our needs, and then put said junk in our trunk!
Seriously, Beware
It's crazy to think that dogs can be cute cuddly creatures that literally lead the blind and herd sheep to safety but there are still signs out there that would try to deter you from meeting them. Of course, that's because they can also be trained to be less than friendly to strangers.
Usually, people might be deterred by the possibility of meeting a guard dog, but in this case, guns seem to be relatively commonplace in this residence. Trespassers might want to think twice about that. They say that dogs imitate their owners so beware of a dog with a gun!
Candy Crush Invitations
Oh, what's that? Did you just get a new Facebook notification? Is it something useful? Did someone like one of your pictures? Is anyone interested in buying that bedside table you've been trying to sell on Marketplace? Nope. It's just your mother doing the only thing she opened a Facebook account for — playing candy crush and inviting you to join the party.
You swipe off the push notification and sigh. This is your life now. Requests like this are some of the most annoying on the internet, and this restaurant wants you to know exactly how annoying they find them.
Welcome to the "OOL"
This sign is a warning that isn’t obvious as soon as you read it but it makes you think for a second. At first, we thought it might be an acronym of some kind. Maybe "Out Of Line"? Not that it makes things any clearer, but still. But then we saw the rest of it.
Having a clear message is important but making people remember what you’re trying to tell them is equally important. Such is the case with this "ool sign." This can be achieved by driving a message home. We totally agree with this sign, as the message is on point and it’s a pretty gross thing to do.
Please Do Not Enter
We all know that The United States of America has a culture of suing. We are pretty litigious people, and you can either accept that fact or see us in court. This sign looks like it lays out the series of events that will follow so no one can say they haven't been warned.
This household also has a culture of not letting people into their property. Apparently, it's dangerous there. Maybe they have some pet bears wandering around. You have been warned that you may get hurt and that your defense won’t stand up in a court of law as this will be used as evidence against you!
The Best Continent Ever
This sign inspires patriotism and is exactly why America is "the best country in the nation", because not only is America a country, and not an entire continent, but it is also the best country within one country! Bravo guys! We sincerely advise brushing up on your geography next time you're going to make such grand statements.
You know what? Even some simple googling can help you out. Before you write your next sign, or maybe even your next text message, ask your old pal Google if it makes any sense. We know human help could be better, but then you're running the risk of whatever human you ask laughing in your face.
Toilet Bandits
We know a good pun we see one, and we are definitely seeing one here. First of all, who was the brave soul that dared steal nothing less than a toilet from the police?! We shudder to think about how they will rid themselves of all those doughnuts and coffee!
Then there is the question of how exactly did they pull it off? Toilet bowls are heavy! Not to mention, firmly attached to a wall and some intense plumbing. Not only are these boys clueless, but they LITERALLY have nothing to go on! Sorry guys, it looks like you'll have to resort to the woods for a while.
Don't Mess With Those Pills
This sign just goes to show just how much effort the Indian Hills Community Center is putting into making lives better for the community. Basically, anyone who drives past it has their day improved by at least 0.032 percent. That is real science. Don't check it though.
We have to say we totally agree with this yard sign. (Technically it's between a road and a parking lot but we will let it slide for now.) At least this guy is taking it in stride and wishing well upon whoever took his anti-depressants. To be honest, they probably are very happy.
Polite Warning
That mood swing really is not for the faint of heart. Some of these are far from being playground staples. We think everyone would love to have a portable sign like this at one point or another in their lives.
Or even a little stack of a few business cards with that sentence they could conveniently whip out of their pockets on bad days. Such a polite way of saying, “back-off”. Hey, at least the person was polite enough to warn us. And if we ever run into a sign like this in real life, we will be sure to run.
Greatest Dad Joke Ever
What a gem from the Colorado-based Indian Hills Community Center. This sign had us laughing for a while. They sure know how to keep the place alive, even in the dead of winter. Doesn’t it sound like some typical dad joke your father would blurt out in the middle of a family dinner? Yes, it’s cheesy. But great, nonetheless.
Ironically, if humans could choose a kind of pet to operate any kind of radiology device, they would probably have chosen dogs over cats. Something tells us that canines have better bedside manners than felines, and humans need that when someone is taking a picture of their innards.
Beware of Dog?
What dog? Oh, you mean that adorable little pooch over there? The one that could fit in the drawer of our bedside table? Sure. We'll watch out. Although this dog looks harmless, we’re sure this sign is there for a reason. Admittedly, it does look tiny, but maybe it has a big bark and maybe an even bigger bite.
Certainly looks like it. It could be the meanest small dog in the history of canines for all we know. Just to be safe, it’s better to ring the bell. And if you manage to get by the dog, beware of its owner. Seems like they are even scarier if they own such a fearsome beast.
Acts of Kindness
It's signs like these that remind us that ultimately, people are good-natured. It's easy to forget it, especially while reading an article full of signs that were put up to keep other people away for various reasons (political affiliation, property damage, unfaithful spouses about to meet a new reality — you name it).
While this isn't exactly a funny sign, it does make us smile. Look, it was even covered in plastic to protect it from the rain! If only more people could be this way, instead of posting the signs we usually see. We would certainly see more smiles in the world.
Your Car Will Be Totally Fine
This humorous photo of a sign exhibits the consequences of grammatical errors on warning signs. While the makers of this sign most likely were trying to convey that all illegally parked cars will be fined — with a "d" — they obviously unintentionally left out this very important letter.
As for the viewers of this sign, it is a blessing in disguise (as long as it holds up in court). Overly concerned about getting a parking ticket? It looks like this sign could get you off scot-free! Even if it does turn out that you’ve parked illegally. Thank the god of grammar.
Jogging Rules
Jogging is a messy business. Runners get red, hot, and sweaty, which usually results in them wearing less textile than they would when they are, let's say, waiting for their package at the post office. This household has had its fair share of joggers pass that house.
Unfortunately, it looks like not everyone got the original memo for the dress code. Something about those jiggling bodies offends the kids (or the parents) in that house. Well, it looks like either the kids are going to have to avert their eyes, or those joggers might have to start covering up. This might not go down well.
No Hanging Zone
Please avoid hanging signs on this fence at all costs. This fence is not made for signs, it merely does not have the strength for it, nor does it look good. This fence doesn't belong to you. Oh, wait? A sign is already there it seems. Lead by example then.
All jokes aside, it seems that this fence belonged to someone who kept getting swamped with signs. Guess there is no way better way to get the message across other than sticking a sign on the fence. It's not like the owner could just cover it with saran wrap. Those things are expensive!
I Surrender
Poor sign, there's something about you that just makes people want to throw things, stones specifically. It's almost like you're asking for it. That little plaque might as well have a bullseye mark on it and a nearby scoreboard. It's a human nature thing. We always want what we can't have.
That's why diets never work. Or, at least, they will only start working once someone sees the power in telling a person they cannot, under any circumstances, have a cucumber. As much as it appears as if you don't want stones thrown at you, trust people to do the exact opposite of what they're told.
Dandelion Party
Dandelions are delightful little flowers that should harm no one. Though on the other hand, gusts of wind may have sent these delicate little petals flying into (possibly allergic) neighbors' noses. Those neighbors then put up a sign asking Mr. Dandelion to handle the overflow of flowers in their yard.
Though we think the all-caps and the three exclamation marks are overkilling it, Mr. Dandelion's response is priceless. When you find yourself overwhelmed by dandelions, just make it a free-for-all! We wonder how many people showed up for dandelion picking that day. Certainly not the ones who put up that sign.
Don't Be Alarmed!
If you live near a farmhouse or a property with stables, hopefully, you would be familiar with this by now, but if not, just know that there is nothing wrong with the horses laying on the ground. Most people aren't used to seeing horses sleeping, so when they do, they think there is something wrong with them.
Are they sick? Are the owners mistreating them? No, they are just taking a nap. Maybe we should do the same. Good to know that, at the very least, they are concerned enough about the horses' wellbeing to call the police about it!
You Have No Business Here
It's always good to research your market before you go door to door. You need to know your crowd before you can sell them anything, be it goods or services. What's even better is when people do the research for you, making it clear if you should or shouldn't bother trying to sway them into buying your paintings. Or vacuum cleaners.
Or join your new religion under the rule of your lizard lord. Now, these solicitors know that they'll be barking up the wrong tree. Will they find it discouraging? Or perhaps they'll whip out those selling skills and rise to the challenge? Go, capitalism.
Deadly Bunny
People have been using animals to protect them from different things for hundreds (possibly thousands) of years. We trained dogs to bark when they hear a stranger in the house, trained cats to hunt our pests, and even trained ducks as emotional support systems. (True story, by the way.)
So yeah, some people have ferocious rottweilers or bulldogs. Others have deadly rabbits that quietly lurk in the shrubbery, waiting for any undesirable visitors. Dare one to trespass, they might meet their fate. Seriously, is this like some kind of Monty Python breed of rabbit? If so, that's actually a little worrying.
Let's Go, Vader
Here's someone who has abandoned all hope (or reality) and allowed themselves to create their own fantasy government. Because why not? Darth Vader might be a good leader, sure, he'll rule with an iron fist and the force may feel a little "dark" at times but hey, we've seen worse.
Plus, aren't we tired of seeing suits and ties in the White House? A nice cape might be just the kind of pizzazz that a country leader needs. We're sure many folks also believe that Vader should be the one true ruler of the galaxy. Where do we sign up?
Muppets for All
If this was on any other political campaign, you might have the seeds of serious dictatorship on your hands. But since it's the Muppets, we're totally fine. In fact, having Fozzie Bear, Kermit, Miss Piggy, or all of them for that matter, might be just delightful, not to mention it will be the most inclusive government in history.
We will appoint them, in order of appearance, as Secretary of Defense, Secretary of Agriculture, Secretary of the Treasury, and Secretary of Labor. Sounds like a winning team to us but we'd be glad to get any of the gang for any part, big or small.
Not Asking for Much
Sometimes you just want to shout something out to the world, or at least put up a sign and tell people. Other times you don't really have much to say but sort of need to get the message out there no matter what.
Today, we all do it on TikTok or Facebook (depending on the age group usually), but apparently, we don't even need elaborate technology in order to do that. We're not quite sure in which category this sign falls. One thing we are sure about, this person did exactly what they set out to do and we couldn't be happier for them.
Isolating
When you are under quarantine, the rest of your property should be out of bounds too. This is why this mailbox is on hiatus and any notifications should be strictly put on hold until said quarantine is complete. Makes perfect sense.
If you can't go to work, how will you make money? And if you can't make money, how will you pay for the bills? It is simple logic. You don't need to have a PhD to get it. It is only fair, really. In fact, maybe that mailman should be popping those bills into the little mailbox next door.
Grow Please
Growing anything in your garden or backyard can be a real pain in the neck. There is the planting, the watering, the different needs of every different plant, and of course, the waiting. After putting so much work into those tomato bushes, they just take their sweet time not caring about how quickly you want them in your salad.
And while there's not much you can do to speed things up, making and putting up a sign like this one seems to take the edge off the anticipation. Say it a little louder, and the plants just might hear you!
Welcome Home
Right, so this one is not what you would traditionally call a "sign", but it was just too good to pass up. Plus, are we not into breaking traditions anyway? Want to keep unwanted guests out? Put this up! People will be sweating in their sandals wondering if this is directed at them.
Better yet — put up a camera at your door and watch the action unfold in front of your eyes as you pet your antisocial cat! Luckily for you, you just get to sit quietly and enjoy the show, and the lack of visitors. Muahaha! Lonely yet?
This Could All Be Yours
Many times when people do yard sales they try to make it as if the whole thing was designed for your personal gain. But, let's face it: no one is bending anyone's arm here. These people are just trying to get rid of their stuff, and most of their stuff, is, well, probably rubbish.
We mean, why would they be getting rid of it otherwise? Why would you sell something that is useful and operating? At least this sign just tells it like it is, you gotta appreciate the honesty. And hey, maybe someone could find some use for a frying pan with no handle.
The Kindness of Strangers
Being alive for as long as we have has taught us many different lessons, one of them being that you really can NOT count on the kindness of strangers. But life can surprise you sometimes. Even thieves can change their ways, as you can see in these two corresponding signs.
All this person had to do was to ask nicely and he got his wheelbarrow back! All that was left was to thank those who returned it with yet another sign. And hey, maybe the person who took it wasn't a thief at all and intended to bring it back once they were finished.
You Want a Pizza Me?
If we only had to say one thing about this sign and then forever hold our peace we'd say that we feel seen and validated by this sign. Becoming one with pizza is our ultimate wish and we are happy to see that it is now possible with the help of this chalkboard message.
But how did this sign find its way into this yard? We think this was made specifically for a pizza party. One big tell-tale sign is the pizza floaty in the back. Next time someone has a pizza party without inviting us they'll get a pizza us!
Private Property
It's always important to respect people's right to privacy, but when you see a sign out in the open like that, it can be hard not to lay your eyes on it. If you already have, then, not reading what it says is just impossible! Reading IS essentially looking.
The most terrible thing is that by the time you are done reading it, you have no way of taking back your dirty deed, and you are only left to live with the guilt. Except it seems like the guilt wasn't that bad as at least one person was comfortable enough to take a picture of it and post it online.
Beware of a Lambush
Getting people to do the basic things all humans should do can be harder than it seems. Closing a door after you just walked through it? Yeah, that concept might be lost on more people than you'd expect. Let alone closing this graveyard's gate to avoid any sheep that might try to graze around there.
We are sure the place has a person in charge of landscaping (seems like a must for a graveyard) and would appreciate not having any sheep interfering with their plans for the place. The only way to get people to behave is by letting them know what happens if they don't. In this case, it's sheep causing chaos.
Howl You Doin’?
If you stop and take a minute to look at all of the signs you've ever seen, you'll notice they always address dog owners, but never the dogs. What terrible discrimination. And to think we dare call dogs our best friends. You can't see but we're shaking our head in disbelief.
This brave sign-maker wanted to correct this terribly unjust practice by addressing dogs and talking to them in a language that they can understand. Sure, it doesn't make much sense, but that's only for us humans. The dogs were given a lovely message we are just not intelligent enough to understand.
We Ain't Lion
Let us tell you one of humanity's most unkept secrets: we are not that smart. We like to pride ourselves on making it to the moon, but we should also remember that some people need to be reminded that their Superman capes will not give them the ability to fly.
Most of us need to constantly be reminded of things that are completely obvious. Sometimes, even a sign that says "Don't feed the lions" or "Don't come near the lions" isn't enough to keep tragedies at bay. Occasionally, actually more often than not, stating the unmistakable, clear facts, is just the only way to go.
Driving Us Crazy
It's happened to all of us, no matter what faith we come from, we've all found ourselves saying the lord's name a bit too much. It can be when we are surprised, scared, or even happy, but we think anger is what triggers that word most. Especially when we're stuck in traffic and experiencing severe road rage.
But, there's a catch, according to this sign, the more you say god's name in vain, the more likely god is to get angry and well, smite you with things that we'll just make you want to say "For god's sake, why do I deserve this?"
A Good, Hoppy Ending
At some point, signs that indicate that children are around have stopped being enough for crazy car drivers who just want to get home as fast as possible and don't seem to care about anything else. They see that yellow traffic sign with the kid's silhouette on it and just keep going like it wasn't even there.
This person came up with the perfect solution: everyone should drive as if the whole road is riddled with bunnies. That imagery is enough to confuse anyone into driving a bit more slowly and carefully. Plus, people will drive slower if only for a chance to read the sign properly.
Off the Arts!
Every once in a while one should take oneself out to soak in some culture and see some good art. But, those who aren't used to seeing fine art might have a hard time knowing how to behave when they finally get to gaze at it for the first time.
Our first intuition wouldn't be to climb or hang on any painting or sculpture, but we've already learned there's always gonna be someone with stupid instincts that will need such a sign. Sure, it seems redundant to the rest of us, but something tells us it was put up there after one too many cases of wild climbing.
The 11th Commandment
This person only had one simple request. All he wanted was for people to stop parking in front of his garage. He tried the usual "No Parking" sign, but that just didn't work. After many failed attempts and many annoying people who couldn't care less, he landed on the perfect idea.
Why ask nicely, when one can use biblical language in order to command others? If it's written like one of the ten commandments, then who knows, maybe it's the 11th one! If it looks like the words of the Lord, people might actually listen. Seriously how has no one else thought of this sooner?
No Witches Allowed
When you think about it, witches do have an unfair advantage when it comes to basketball. After all, they can fly on their brooms all the way up to the hoop and shoot a basketball in a way not even the tallest person on earth could.
This is why witches should indeed be banned from playing against us humans. Or, if they really want to get on that court, they would have to leave the broom on the bleachers to even things out. What actually promoted this sign, we'll never know, but we bet there's a great story behind it.
No Turning Back
Do you ever feel like no matter what you do, everything turns out wrong? We all feel that way sometimes. Well, just today, especially for you, we have a sign that affirms exactly what you've already been feeling, you have, indeed, chosen the wrong way.
Who knows, maybe you'll learn something along the way! We mean, you probably won't, so at this point, you may as well just enjoy the ride, cause it seems like there's no turning back. Seriously, this sign looks like it is positioned in a place where people can see only one they are ON the wrong way.
Lawn and Order
We don't know if this lawn mowing business is as good as its name, but we do know they have already cracked one very important part of marketing — have an amazing, unforgettable name. Next time we need our lawn taken care of we are calling them no matter how new or functional our lawnmower is.
As if their brand name wasn't good enough, they also got themselves an amazing tagline, and we really have nothing left to do but tip our hat to whoever wrote this. And maybe try and call that person and get them to work for us.
Less Is More
When you live in a country that had a president who only had about three words in his vocabulary, tops, you learn you can make do with much less. Who needs too many words anyway? And don't even get us started on synonyms. More than one word with the same meaning? How redundant!
Let's face it, even if this person were to write something different in each and every line, the gist of it would have still been the same — they are selling the best stuff. And of course, for anyone who didn't get the message, the sign has hair that matches said former president.
Selling Your Ex's Stuff
When people think they have found happy-ever-after, they tend to accumulate a lot of stuff. Why? We are not exactly sure, it could simply be due to the fact that each of the two brings their own stuff and everything they get after that just gets piled up on top of it all.
Either way, it's indeed very sad when a couple splits, but those who live nearby might actually have a chance to loot the grave of the pair's relationship. As long as they do so before the ex-wife comes back home from her 9 to 5, of course.
That Escalated Quickly
That message is loud and clear, and we wonder if anyone has ever put it to the test. Sure, nobody likes to come back home only to find out some inconsiderate maniac parked in the one place they were not supposed to. Still, violating those who trespassed? Isn't that... just a little bit extreme?
Aren't there more peaceful ways to resolve such a problem? Calling the police maybe? Having the stranger's car towed? Both methods are tried and true. Maybe this sign is so intimidating that the person who put it up never had to follow through on what they promised.
A Sign of Passion
With so many people turning their front lawns into advertising grounds for presidential candidates, it is so refreshing to see at least one house uses theirs to advertise something completely different. You know, not all signs were created to ward or tell off, some were created purely out of love, passion, and the need to spread the truth.
This one here is a prime example of the latter one. Simply put, these people wholeheartedly believe that 2007's "Michael Clayton" is vastly underrated, as they put it. With so much devotion to the cause, how can we not want to join?
Getting Topical and Physical
We've heard it said that one must strike the iron while it's hot, as nothing draws customers in more than a relevant reference. In this case, we presume the sign was put up right after a certain Oscar incident that will be remembered forever. That is quite the hot iron to strike if you ask us.
What can you do? If you're offering smack-down prices, you gotta let the public know you're offering smack-down prices. Only Will himself can be aggressively enthusiastic enough to deliver the news! We also kind of wonder what dear Mr. Smith would have to say about the sign if he ever found out.
Spread the Word
Usually, come October, most of the yards in your neighborhood are going to have at least one lawn sign. Maybe it's for the top spot in the government, maybe it's for a senator or representative, maybe it's for some local officials the homeowners think have their heads screwed on straight.
Sometimes, however, people just want to put up some signs. Dan Payton has the right idea here – make a sign for yourself, even if you don't want to have a spot as a lawmaker. Maybe you'll get a chuckle. Heck, you might even get a few votes. For something.
Dark, but Memorable
There are lots of signs out there. There are studies about the amount of advertising we get on a daily basis, and it's something like four thousand to ten thousand each day – and that might just be online! For a display to truly stand out, it has to grab the viewer's attention.
Publicly saying that your gramps has just passed and you're getting rid of all his stuff is certainly one way to do it. We can't say for certain if it's the best way, but it's certainly a way. It's not the worst tactic for spreading word of mouth. Remember, all press is good press.
What Exactly Are You Selling?
Fabio – that's Fabio, isn't it? Yeah, we're pretty sure that's Fabio. Fabio is definitely the kind of guy that draws the eye, especially when he's shucked his shirt and is carrying a couple of fistfuls of a chain. No doubt this caught plenty of eyes while people were driving through the neighborhood, and that's the entire point.
Fabio was an icon on book covers, movies, and magazines for so long because of his impressive physique, so why not utilize him to get shoppers at your place, too? There might be a legal question or two, but most people don't care if a yard sale uses a trademarked image.
Be Warned
At first, you might think this is a tongue-in-cheek joke about the local constabulary napping on the job, but a “sleeping policeman” is actually another name for a speed bump. The term is more popular in the UK. If you aren't aware of the meaning, this sign might lead to a lot of confusion, but it's actually quite a helpful warning.
Speed bumps are a big help to people who live or work in the area since they keep speeding vehicles to a minimum. You wouldn't want to run over any chickens on your way through the neighborhood, now would you?
Please! Please!
Having a car hit your fence is obviously no fun, but having it happen over and over becomes an incredible annoyance. Those things are expensive! This fence is right next to a small local church that apparently ministers to the poor drivers of the community.
Since it became such an issue, the fence owner has put up at least four signs, including a big colorful one in an attempt to calm things down. However, it looks like the fences have been ignored – the left side of the picture shows us a big dent in the chain link. Read the signs, people.
We Will, uh, Try?
This certainly isn't the kind of sign that you'll see with any regularity. How many people have horses that they'll take into town? How many towns have an area that is referred to as the "common"? And how many places combine both of those groups into one exceptionally strange place?
As you might guess, this sign is from the UK. Such classic ambiance and somewhat outdated worries are right at home in Jolly Old England (or whichever zone this is from). Don't worry, you won't be seeing any of our horses on the common. We think. We're still not totally sure what that means.
Signs From Forever Ago
Once upon a time, the blog Hyperbole and a Half was the only thing worth reading on the internet. Funny stories and hilariously bad MSPaint drawings made them worth reading and re-reading, and the image of the blog's author getting ready to “clean all the things” took off online as a hype picture – something to get people excited.
This person knew it was just colorful, energetic, and eye-catching enough to act as the perfect sign to draw people into the yard sale they were having. Of course, anybody who has been on the internet probably thinks this picture is ancient history.
Who Knows What Will Happen?
It's a good idea to follow safety signs whenever they're posted. This one seems like a particularly good one to follow, just because of the artwork. Don't go swimming or a terrible nest of sea snakes will drag you down to the depths.
Maybe this sign is also a warning – don't go swimming, or this sodden, dripping, drowned man will come and get you. He has a lot of pamphlets about how dangerous it is to swim in some places. This sign is from Baton Rouge, Louisiana, which means this sign might be warning you of hungry, hungry gators.
Thanks for the Warning
Is it a warning? Maybe it's a promise. This sign says that there are river monsters. The water beyond doesn't even look like a river – it looks more like a big lake or a sea. So why would this sign be so close to water if it isn't even a river? It's like you can't trust anybody these days.
And what would the purpose of the sign be? River monsters wanted, perhaps? We don't know about you, but we don't see a whole lot of river monsters these days. Not even in rivers. They're all retiring and getting houses upstate.
Some People Like Their Privacy
There are lots of people out there that are sick and tired of others walking through their property. If you live in the city or the suburbs, this is usually just cutting through a yard to get home or to the store, but in the country, there can be a lot more.
People might hunt or pick food from your property, and sometimes you just don't want that. Sure, you can put up a fence, but fences can be climbed or circumvented. How about a sign that warns of bodily harm if you don't pay attention? That might just do it.
Be the Only One Left
In an effort to reduce the amount of illegal and dangerous substances that are in certain parts of the country, a few signs have gone up. One of them seems to implore dealers to turn in their competition – and we are sure that they will be let off Scot-free.
This is, of course, also a sign to notify regular dealers that there is a hotline for reporting these scoundrels and ruffians, and the little bit of humor that it uses is a good way to make it memorable for everyone who drives past. Maybe they even got some takers.
Making the Best of a Bad Situation
If you're like every well-minded person around the world, there were a couple of years when you were sick to death of wearing one of those stupid masks, and you will gladly avoid doing so again. Still, the masks did have one really important advantage – they made some people look a lot more attractive.
If they can't see your mouth, they can't see your snaggletooth, your coffee stains, or whatever else you have hiding under there. All you have to do is maintain eye contact, and you'll be golden. Still, if you don't wear a mask, you'll be able to breathe. The decision is yours.
All for the Hive
Bees are an incredibly important part of our ecosystem, and they should be encouraged. They get a bad rap thanks to the whole stinging business, but here's something you might not know – if a bee has stung you, it's just resigned itself to death.
A bee's stinger is connected to a number of important organs inside its body, so if the stinger is left inside you, it will result in the bee's demise. This is a last-ditch effort and the most powerful weapon for defending the hive. Hence the sign – the bee isn't going down without a fight.
She Is All of Us
This lady encountered possibly one of the rarest signs in the world – beware of falling deer. The best part is it isn't even “watch out for live moving deers that are above you.” No, this sign is a warning that if you're unlucky and you aren't paying attention you might get hit by half-eaten bits of deer carcasses.
The woman in the picture has the correct face. Worry, confusion, surprise, and exasperation at what she suddenly has to deal with. It's pretty much the same face that anybody would have on their face when they first see this sign.
Keep Walking, Dufresne
There is not going to be any redemption here, thanks to this handy, helpful sign. A lot of people are happy to be aware of the fact that they are right near a state prison, even if they are not happy to BE right near a state prison.
Roll up the windows, kids, and do not make eye contact. Also, make sure not to pick up any people that have their thumbs hanging out as they are standing by the side of the road. Maybe prisons should go back to the black-and-white striped jumpsuits, just so there is no confusion.
Quick, Get In!
This sign is warning drivers that hitchhikers might be inmates that have escaped from prison, but the wording is a bit confusing. If you didn't think it through, you might think that hitchhikers are people that are trying to get away from inmates – they are escaping FROM inmates.
Hopefully, this hasn't caused any confusion. We also hope that the people in charge of this sign noticed the mistake and issued a new version that was better worded. Sorry escapees, you're going to have to hoof it if you want to fully complete your escape plan and get to safety.
Ever Wonder Why They're Called Nightmares?
While it is often thought a nightmare has to do with a horse in its original etymology, it's actually from the Old English word "mare," a demon that torments with frightening dreams. The horse in this picture, however, is absolutely a nightmare – just look at that thing.
It looks like it's going to be in your bedroom when you wake up in the middle of the night. The sign doesn't help, either – it kind of looks like that “may” should be a “will.” The end should read “and the horse will enjoy it.” Shoo horse! Let me sleep!
Hope You Brought a Jacket
Hippos seem like they're friendly, lovable creatures that you can hug and squeeze, but don't be fooled — they are actually one of the most dangerous animals in the wild. They are incredibly fast, quite territorial, and have jaws that can easily crush melons. Plus, they come with something called a splatter zone, and that is never a fun time.
While it's probably just a warning about the mud that might come flinging off a tail after a dunk, this sign looks like it's warning about something much, much worse. Something that there should absolutely be a sign warning you about.
You Have Been Warned
Rocks. Should we walk and/or climb on them? Well, what does the sign say? It says not to, and that if we get hurt and try to sue we will be mocked for it. I guess that's that. Get my crampons.
You have to love a sign that not only tells you exactly what is best practice but will also make fun of you for ignoring it or going against its advice. These are usually put up after enough people have done something stupid. Enough so that the owner has decided that people should feel stupid before they get hurt.
Or Just Start Eating
Corn mazes are good, simple fun for people who want to enjoy the outdoors while the weather is getting colder. Add in other autumn experiences like hot apple cider, costumes, and starry nights, and you have a recipe for fun. Of course, those mazes can be complicated, and some people might get lost.
Don't worry, this sign says – help is on the way. It might be a couple of days, but there's plenty of food around you in case you get hungry. Try not to talk that much, though – unless it rains you won't have much to drink.
Message Received
Don't try to break into a wolf sanctuary. We aren't sure why anyone would want to, but just don't do it. Not only are there the normal fears about gun owners, police, and going to jail, but you also might get mauled by dozens of wolves.
Heck, this spot might be the safest place in the county if this sign is posted all the way around it. Yeah, go ahead, try to sneak in. We bet it won't end up very well for you. Any intruder will need some body armor. Or they'll have to carry a lot of big dog treats.
No Words Required
We'll be honest: we don't really know what this sign is trying to warn us of. We have a few ideas, and none of them are all great. Clearly, the top part means don't make your water here – fair enough – but what about that bottom portion? Are those...eggs? Coconuts, maybe? We don't really want to think about it.
Something will happen with scissors and it will be exciting in some way. At this point, we can only guess, but each of those guesses will come with cringes and gasps of imagined pain. Maybe just avoid this place fully.
It Was Fun While It Lasted
It is not too hard to figure out what this sign means, but you have to admit it's doing it in a unique way. Don't go down the slope or you might get attacked by alligators, but why have a person in a wheelchair?
Our assumption is that it's because you lose control on a steep slope if you're on something with wheels. Most of the time, however, there aren't gators at the bottom of the slope. Just make sure to keep a hand close to the brakes and you should be fine. It's either that or feed the gators.
The Sequel to “Hotel California”
Most cities and towns have a welcome sign, or several, like this one, positioned on the roads going in or out of them. This sign for the town of Chinnor has a certain ominous feeling to it. Make sure to keep your hands on the wheel and your eyes on the road. Also, you'll never escape.
We assume this sign is supposed to say something like “people are so charming and the sights are so pleasant in Chinnor that you won't want to go home.” However, it makes it sound more like someone is going to trap you in their basement.
How Bad Must a Bird Be?
How much nonsense does a crow have to get involved in to get a sign – multiple signs! – that warns people about it? Crows can be a lot of trouble, but usually, they let people live their lives unless those people are acting the fool to the birds.
Someone must have really messed up this bird if the people who live there have to put up more than one sign that lets others know to keep an eye on the sky. They also have the crow singing what appears to be a Nickelback song. We'd love to know more.
My Parents Lied to Me
No poop fairy? But then what keeps leaving me presents under my pillow every night? This sign has ruined our childhoods. We are inconsolable. Let us have a little bit of time here. Now that we've recovered, we have to agree with the sign.
If you're walking your dog, you need to be the one to clean up after it. They don't care – they're dogs. They'll do their business right on the living room carpet if you let them. That's why you have to have little plastic baggies with you when you're out on the town with your pooch.
Finally, a Sign You Can Trust
Signs that cajole you into a shopping establishment often mangle the truth, but not this one, no sir. Inside are good times, memorable jokes, and tasty things to put inside your pie hole. Outside are work, taxes, noisy cars, and big dogs that probably want to eat your underpants.
There's really no hard choice to make here, might as well stop in to take the edge off. Want to have a quiet drink while you think about all the important stuff you need to do? How about a busy environment that will make you forget your worries? Somehow, this perfect place is both.
For the Man With Six Fingers (To Hold Purchases)
During yard and garage sale season, you want to attract buyers any way you can, short of sending the kid out to the corner with a bullhorn. One of the best ways is to make some bright signs and hang them up all over the neighborhood.
How about adding the face of the beloved Inigo Montoya, played by Mandy Patinkin? There are a lot of worse things you could do. Someone who is really creative could make a whole set of yard sale signs that have the memorable characters from “The Princess Bride.” Not going to the yard sale? Inconceivable!
It's Not in Revelations, Either
If a heatwave goes on long enough, you start to look for anything that can take the temp down a few notches, even if that means getting on your knees and clasping your hands together. Sure, God might have created the seasons, the sun, the wind, and the rain, but he probably didn't make any specific heat wave for any specific reason.
It just gets hot sometimes. Have to have the bad with the good. Also, global warming is all on us. And it probably isn't Hell unless you see a space marine running around with a shotgun, clearing the place out.
Good to Know
This yellow caution sign off the side of a road in Alaska says that it isn't in use, which makes us ask why it's up. There are probably some good reasons why this sign actually is up – maybe they keep it there in case they do need it, and they don't want to have to worry about sticking a sign into the frozen ground.
It gets powerful cold up there in Alaska. At least you don't have to worry about the signs that much. Is there going to be another sign telling us when the sign IS in use?
Gas Pedal or Brake?
If you spend a lot of time driving around in suburbs and neighborhoods, you've probably spotted one of these signs. They're supposed to get you to slow down – you don't want to hit anybody trying to catch the light. One placed right outside of a graveyard is... perhaps a different thing to think about.
Would you want to stop and think about the horrible things that have happened, or would you want to put the pedal to the metal and get out of there as quickly as possible? If it were up to us, we'd lean toward the second option.
Proven Effectiveness
If you're having problems with a dog or cat that is just too rambunctious and rowdy, one thing you should think about is this genealogy-ending procedure. Getting your pets spayed or neutered is one of the things you're responsible for as an owner, and it often results in a much better situation for both you and your furry friend.
Just like the funny sign says, it often calms them down. Hey, the vet even has an app, so that you can... do the procedure at home? No, that doesn't seem correct. Maybe it's just to let you know that their medication is ready.
Dogs Always Follow Signs
Most of the time, dogs will do their messy business wherever they please. Step one is to house-train them so that they at least know to go outside. At that point, however, it's pretty much free reign. A good dog owner will carry a couple of plastic baggies to store refuse in so that it doesn't taint a public park or a neighbor's lawn.
But not everyone is a good owner, it seems. At least one owner was deficient in this act of common courtesy – and, thus, this sign was added to a specific lawn. We hope it did the trick.
Why Do You Think His Name Is Richie?
Lionel pads his wallet by finding the best deals at yard and garage sales during the summer, and now he's out there telling others about some of the best places to shop. He has even modified the lyrics of one of his most famous and emotional tunes to get people to notice.
We, on the other hand, have noticed that bright, neon green is the most popular color for yard sale signs – probably because they're hard to miss even if you aren't paying that much attention. Add a picture of a soulful singer and you have a winning combination.
Good Advice for the Modern Pet Fan
It seems strange that in our modern era, there are some people who just let their dogs do their business wherever they want. Common courtesy says that you should carry plastic bags to pick up after your pet, but there are some that can't even manage that much.
This sign says that if you don't have the mental bandwidth to not leave poop all over the place, then you shouldn't have a dog, you should have a cat. They like to go to the bathroom in a little box of sand that is inside your home. Not on the lawn.
We Hope You'll Come and Buy Thomething
You always have to spread the word about your sales, and big signs on the corners of busy roads are the classic way to do so. One thing that isn't as common is to have a picture of big bruiser Mike Tyson, whose lilting lisp is almost as famous as the ridiculous beatdowns he delivered to opponents in the ring.
You won't lose an ear if you go to this community center yard sale, and you might gain plenty of fun finds. Want to make your yard sale sign memorable? This is a quick and easy way to do it.